I too am faced with this issue. I have about 100,000 photos to manage. I find the photos app opaque and confusing. I do enjoy the AI selected slide shows my phone pops up, and usually watch them. My file library structure was exported from Aperture back in the day, and remains my primary photo structure.
When icloud first launched, it had a feature ‘photostream’ that would populate all your devices with the most recent 1000 photos taken by your phone. That seems to have gone away. Apparently there is no way to sync across devices without storing your entire photo library in the cloud. I am not willing to pay for icloud storage just to do that – I don’t have a multi device workflow, and cannot foresee a use case for doing edits on an ipad or iphone. I just spent the past week setting up a mac mini m4 (excellent value on that machine BTW), and for the past few years I have been doing an iphone ‘dump’ onto my Mac to free up space on the phone. I had several thousand images to sort and bring in to the folder structure but I now have tons of duplicates across the finder and photos.
I turned off icloud photos, as when I set up my new mac, it auto dumped the entire photo library into iCloud, and immediately consumed the entirety of my 5G storage.
Is there any way to sync across devices as photostream used to do? I don’t want to STORE them in the cloud, but surely there is a way to sync them across the cloud.